“Sixteen down, ‘youthful infatuation’. Any ideas?” Robert posed, his glasses sitting perched on the tip of his nose while he peered over the top of them to better read the crossword on his phone.  

“Puppy love?” 

“This is why I keep you around,” he said with a light chuckle. We’ve been married for 5 years now, and the morning crossword has become one of the highlights of my day ever since Rob became obsessed with it about a month ago. 

“Four across, ‘great fear and suffering’. Yeesh, that’s lovely.”

“How many letters?” 

“Eight.” 

“Hmm. Dreadful?” He let out a whistle as he filled in the final space. “Another crossword defeated. That’s how you start a day!” We both laughed, everything just felt so light with Robert. Being in love with someone is so painfully and wonderfully embarrassing, I wouldn’t trade it for the world. 

The rest of the day carried on without incident, but I couldn’t stop thinking about one of the clues from earlier. ‘Great fear and suffering’. Something about it just kept on nagging at me, so much so the last thought I had before closing my eyes was utterly dreadful. 

– – – – – – – – – – – – –

“Ha, they thought they could get me with that sneaky little misspelling in the clue, it takes more than that to pull one over on old Rob.” I snorted into my coffee mug at that one. He’s the least arrogant person I know, so it’s always funny hearing him talk like that. 

“Alright, last one left again today is four across. Song title: Little ____.” 

“Little things! One Direction!” 

“Damn, you didn’t even hesitate.”

“I was a fourteen year old girl in 2012, of course I didn’t hesitate.”

“Touché.”

“So yesterday’s four across was ‘dreadful’, and today’s is ‘things’, it’s almost like the start of some kind of message.” Robert joked. I laughed along with him, but I also couldn’t help but think about my dream last night. I’m sure it’s just an overactive imagination and my love for procedurals making me paranoid, but a healthy amount of conspiratorial thinking never hurt anyone. 

“Alright, time to head out. Be safe today, okay? Don’t let the assholes on the train give you grief.”

“Please, the twenty year olds with bad haircuts dressed in camo are the least of my concerns.” Rob just rolled his eyes at that.

“For my peace of mind, just please promise you won’t antagonize them.” He pleaded, gripping both my shoulders.

“I promise, but only if you do the same, you’re the one with the smart mouth!”

– – – – – – – – – – – – –

“Four across, ‘To start something new’, begin. EASY. I’m getting too good at this.” Robert boasted.

“You should just start making your own, since you’ve clearly progressed past just playing.” I teased.  

“How would I manage without your support?”

“You wouldn’t.” He leaned over and kissed my cheek.

“You got that right. Oh and by the way, I’m going to be home late tonight, I’ve got to run by my moms and put up a shelf for her, it shouldn’t take too long.”

“Okay, I’ll be sure to leave you some dinner.” As he got up to bring his plate to the sink I looked back down at the completed crossword on his phone. Begin.

“You okay?” Rob asked.

“Yeah fine, why?”

“Because I just asked you a question and you’re just staring at my phone.”

“Sorry, just thinking about the crossword. Or four across more specifically.”

“Oh yeah? How come?” I felt my cheeks get hot when he asked that. I know I can trust him, but it still doesn’t feel any less ridiculous to say out loud that you’re lost in thought over a conspiracy theory you fabricated based on nothing but 3 crossword clues. “Hello, Earth to Val.”

“Right, sorry, it’s just, you’re going to laugh.”

“Probably, but I promise I’ll still love you.” I smacked his arm.

“It’s just that the clues the last few days, they kind of sound like a warning almost. ‘Dreadful things begin’. I don’t know, it just feels deliberate.” I didn’t meet his gaze while I said that, I already felt like an idiot, I didn’t need to see that reflected on his face too.

He paused for entirely too long before responding. “Okay, so you think that the person who writes the crossword is leaving a warning in the answers of four across, do I have that right?”

“Listen, I get that this sounds insane, but it just feels a little too coincidental, ya know? Three’s a pattern and all that.”

“You have got to stop watching detective shows before bed.”

“I’m serious!” He just chuckled at that and hugged me.

“See, I told you I’d still love you. Even with your little tinfoil hat.” I smiled into his chest, but honestly, I’m a little sad he just outright dismissed it. Sure it’s out there, but I like to think I’m a generally rational person. At least worth even considering I might be on to something. 

When I got home, I started on dinner, making sure to cook something that would keep well so Robert didn’t have to worry when he got home. Seven rolled around, and I looked at my phone, checking to see if I’d missed a text, he’d usually be home by now. 

Almost immediately after picking up my phone, I got a call from an unknown number. Normally, I’d just ignore it as it’s more than likely just someone calling begging for blood donations again, but something in my gut told me to answer. It was the hospital. 

The next few hours passed in a blur. After hanging up, I assume I got myself together and drove up to the ER, since that’s where I’m sitting now, just after 2:45am. Rob was on his way home from his mothers, some asshole drunk driver ran a red light and T-boned him. The doctors all say he’s going to be just fine, and I do believe them. But no matter how hard I’m trying not to, all I can think about is that damn crossword. Four across. Dreadful things begin. 

I mean, obviously there’s no way the crossword writer could have known about a car accident, those are usually spur of the moment after all. But I also know that the universe has a dark sense of humor when it comes to things like this. 

As the night passed by, I floated in and out of sleep, wanting to make sure I’d be awake when Rob woke up. It was around 5:15am when he stirred the first time. He didn’t say anything, more so just grunted as he tried to shift. I can only imagine the pain he’s in. 

“Hey, shh, don’t try to move, just lay down. I’ll get the doctor and let her know you’re awake.” He just nodded and closed his eyes again. I made my way into the hall of the hospital and over to the nurses station. I passed several armed guards on my way, doing my best to hide my displeasure at their presence. They were showing up in more and more places, it was getting ridiculous. 

After letting the nurses know Rob was awake, I made my way back to his bedside. His eyes were open again, and he seemed more alert.

“Stupid question, I’m sure, but how are you feeling?” I asked while brushing his hair back from his face. He looked so fragile like this.

“Positviley dreadful,” he smirked. 

“Glad to see your sense of humor fared better than your collarbone.” That got a big laugh out of him. 

“Speaking of, I believe now is as good a time as any to do our morning crossword. But you’re going to need to take the lead today.” 

We spent the next while going over the clues, laughing about the guesses, and even roping the nurses in to giving us their best guesses when we got stumped. It was nice to have that sense of normalcy after such an emotional night. 

“Now, Val, it’s time for your conspiracy clue!” 

“Don’t think I won’t slap you just because you’re in a hospital bed.” He clutched his chest like I’d wounded him and laughed. 

“To, Two, ___. Too, obviously.” I said, more to myself than Rob.

“I’m guessing that’s a clue you need to read to answer. Okay so ‘Dreadful things begin too’. I think that kind of puts an end to your warning theory, right?” I mean, I suppose he has a point. It’s looking more likely that I am just a little crazy, but I also like to honor my intuition since it’s rarely ever steered me wrong. However, given the circumstances, I think it’s best to just keep any beliefs I have about that to myself from now on.

“Yeah, you’re right. I guess it’s just an overactive imagination.”

“That’s just part of your masterful genius.”

– – – – – – – – – – – – –

Rob was discharged from the hospital after two days, the worst of his injuries being the broken collarbone. Luckily, it was on his non-dominant side, so he’s still been able to remain relatively independent, which truthfully, we’re both glad about. 

We’ve kept up with me running the crossword for now, since it’s still pretty difficult to type one handed on a phone. The last two days of four across were ‘Late’ and ‘Now’, leaving us with ‘Dreadful things begin too late now’. An ominous string of words if I’ve ever seen it. 

I still don’t have any actual clues as to what this could be a warning for. I think my next course of action is to spend my down time at work doing some social media stalking into the author of the crossword. I think that will give me a better idea as to what they might be trying to warn against. 

“Good morning, my love.” Rob said as he entered the kitchen. I’d just sat down at the table with my coffee, ready to get started, but for some reason when I tried to pull up the website, it wouldn’t load. “Having problems?”

“Yeah, for some reason the puzzle isn’t loading, let me try a different browser.” I swapped over, and was still running into the same error, it was as if the crossword never existed. “Nothing. Looks like the whole website is down, I can’t even click on the breaking news.”

“Weird. Probably just some code error, I’m sure they’re getting hundreds of reports about it. I guess we’ll have to revisit this over dinner.”

“It’s a date.” 

– – – – – – – – – – – – –

1 year later

Five hours after I left home that day, all the phone lines and internet went down. The military started rolling into cities, ushering people back into their homes, immediately arresting anyone who pushed back. For most, that was the last time they were seen. The news went dark as well, all the stations just displaying the government seal.  

I got back home that day to an empty house. Despite the fact I knew the phones didn’t work, I tried over and over and over again to reach Rob. I still don’t know what became of him.

I should have realized sooner, looking back now, what was happening. I always liked to pride myself on being educated and aware. I thought I was. I knew how bad things were before the takeover, before they officially seized power. The flags were bright red as legacy news organizations were bought up by the people who had the most to lose from honest journalism. Crossword puzzles were nothing but complicity in the end.

The original writer of the crossword was found dead in her home not long after the takeover. The reports all said suicide. I know better than to question that, but we all know what that really means. I don’t belong here, in this version of life. Or maybe I do, I don’t know. I’m not sure of much anymore. Only that it’s too late now.